Being to much !

Hey there bloggie~ :) , It's been a long time since my last post, right? But I never ever forget you ! Seriously! I just don't have much time to be on my laptop and updates about my life, 

Mm~ How do I start?  It's been really hard for me this year , Totally hard  without my best friends here beside me... I can't get my things right.. My gred become worst since I start to be in form 5.. and I don't know how to get my last moment for being the top in the class ~ TT 

Am I this bad bloggie? I mean , am I stupid or something? For some reason , I think I am , but I should not think about it.. It will make me more stupid . I just have my exam before the holidays , and the marks is suck ! I hate it ! Totally not satisfies for what I have done, being the low marks in Chemistry , is the most worst thing I ever had ! 

But I have promise to my self to change, and that's why I just kept it all inside and just smile when teacher said that I just put more attention to LOVE than to STUDY .. It's hurt me a lot when I just remember that words.. and I am really embarrassed that moment, It's hard to make my face staright and just pretend that nothing ever happen.. It's really HARD !  I want to be good in study , but why I keep falling down ~.. I have work hard, I have been study through out all the chapter, but I'm still lacking with it.. I really want to prove to the teachers and my parents that I can do it! What ever matter is~ 

I had enough for this few month , and I need to wake up ! ,  I need to get my strength and keep strong for just another few month until I sit on my SPM moment~  Ya Allah , I really want to achieve these all with an A's , I really have tried hard,  Please help me,  .. I know I should not blame anyone for me being like this, but I don't know why, I think I just keep myself silent when something happen to me, and it's making me stress and make me cannot focus when in the middle of the exam  , I really want to be the one , the one who my parents want me to be , want me to achieve, 

Bloggie, Sorry for letting all my angers here today , but I can't handle it more,  I can't and I don't want to cry , I just tried stops all my tears , and wipe all of it. 

~ PikoMinchan ~